Today has been... The greatest day ever. I really don't know how else to explain it. I mean, of course there were things that went wrong here and there, like always, but in the end, it was just an incredible day. At least, an incredible ending to a relatively normal day.
I don't even have anything to say about the "day" part of my day. I mean, class, nap, lunch, hanging around with Julio, University Band, and then more hanging around with Julio, Paul included this time, until he left to go write a paper. There was nothing special about today, until the conclusion.
Julio and I retired to my dorm room after University Band rehearsal, because that's what we usually do. It's become a sort of routine since we started dating, and it's always fun. Sometimes we'll lay in my bed and talk, or sleep for a little, and other times we'll goof off and have tickle fights or, like today, we'll play two-player games on my iTouch and I'll beat him in everything so bad that he just doesn't want to play games anymore. I'm just that good.
I've never had so much fun with him before. I mean, I've had lots of fun with him in previous times, but tonight had to be one of the greatest ever. After I kicked his butt in as many games as I could, he spent a little time on my computer checking his Facebook (since his computer at home is broken) and then we switched, and I checked mine and he ate sunflower seeds. Because that's what he does. He has like, a stash of sunflower seeds in the corner of my room. And they get ALL OVER the floor. Madison's only problem with him is that he makes the room a mess with them. Lol.
Anyway. So when I was done, I sat down in his lap and we played a couple more games on my iTouch until we realised how late it was, and that he had to be home soon. I usually walk him downstairs and out to his car, because he parks at the deck that's farthest away from my dorm because his class is in Olin.
It's freezing outside--I was wearing one of his many zip-up hoodies that he's left in my room, and my new peacoat. I'm also dawning a pair of trashed up sweatpants and a Royalton Rocks! tshirt. I just wanted to be comfy and warm--that's how I roll.
We're walking and holding hands and talking and he's saying the sweetest things. He goes, "You know, we have so much in common," and we start naming off things that we like the same, or that we do the same, or something like that. And he told me how excited he was that we're going to Cedar Point on Saturday, and we also had a conversation about how he thought I was so cute today, and I told him I was just being selfish and blah, blah, blah... That ended up in something about how we're both just jealous people and something or other... Anyway.
We keep walking and the conversation switches to weddings. He goes, "Would it be weird to have a red wedding?" And I said no way. Our favourite color is red, both of us. I told him all of these plans that I have for my wedding, and he's laughing at me and telling me things he has planned, and then he tells me a story about how his favourite flower came to be the lily. It was kind of cute.
Then we get to his car and he kisses me a couple times, and then we get in and drive to the cripple parking lot, where he always drops me off. The whole car ride, we're listening to our song, and I'm just having a blast, because I like him so much, and I love being around him. He's just an incredible person, and I'm so, so lucky. Screw the people who don't like him--he's the greatest thing that's ever happened to me, and that's what matters. <3
He pulls alongside the curb outside where my dorm is, and we kiss again, and he's singing me the next song that came onto his iPod--another love song, and it's the cutest thing ever, because he sucks at singing, but I don't even care, because when he sings to me, it's the most perfect voice I've ever heard. Liking someone this much can really do that to you.
We're sitting in his car for a good seven minutes and he decides to pull into a space and put his flashers on so he can stop wasting gas. And I kid you not, we sit there for twenty more minutes kissing, him singing me love songs and cuddling with me and holding my hand--and for that half hour that I was with him in his car, I was the happiest girl on the planet. He makes my heart flutter and bounce around and... He's done so much for me, I can't even bring myself to say everything he's done already.
I just hope that I'm able to give enough back to him. I don't want to lose him.
This one's a keeper. [:
I know I haven't updated this thing in basically forever, but I'm trying to get back into the swing of blogging once again, and I figure, what better time than right now, when my friendships are falling to pieces?
I hate being dropped like a bomb. I really hate it. And I can see why they don't want to hang out with me anymore--because I spend so much time with Julio--but to be incredibly honest, our relationship started so fast that I'm still getting to know him. And I'll never know everything about him, but seriously.
So. Long story short, I've noticed--and so has Julio--that since we started dating, I've kind of been neglecting my friends. But it hasn't been bad at all. We still had lunch together, and we'd hang out and walk to class together and have fun during marching band and everything, but all of a sudden, things just stopped.
I stopped getting invited out with them, and they've stopped talking to me as a whole. They don't even want to eat lunch with me anymore--Julio and I were going to sit with them for lunch yesterday before we had to go to the football game, but I decided against it, since when I asked to sit there, they didn't seem so enthused about letting me. So we sat at a table near them, and I realised that I was completely ignored. And everything they talked about were things that I wasn't in on. And I feel so horribly left out.
I know I'm complaining a lot, and this is probably incredibly ridiculous, but I feel like crap. Caroline was my best friend when I first started college, and the one day where I tried to patch things up--especially with her--she was silent and uncaring. Steph has been skipping the classes we have together, religiously, and then blaming it on the fact that she's sick, or that she forgot, or she got the times mixed up, or something. It's the eighth week of the semester now, I'm pretty sure that she hasn't mixed up or forgotten any of them.
I don't really have a problem with Terri, as she still talks to me whenever we see each other, and she even texts me sometimes. Annie completely ignores my texts and whenever I go to make a comment to her, it's kind of shrugged aside. These four girls were some of my best friends when I got here--we were flute buddies. And now we don't even talk. And it hurts. It really bothers me.
They go to the mall, they go ice skating, they go swimming at the rec, they go bowling in the student union--and I'm never invited. I know I'm such a sourpuss for complaining like this, and I know it's my fault for spending so much time with Julio that they sort of forget about me, but I've had a lot of time free lately; Julio and I have stopped spending so much time together, and I'm spending more and more time alone.
I've realised that my boyfriend is my only friend anymore.
What did I do, and how can I fix it?